I read last week where the Gwinnett Braves are having a name-the-team contest to change their name because there seems to be confusion between the Atlanta Braves and Gwinnett Braves. I’m not sure who they say are confused about this. I mean it’s pretty clear to me the difference between the ATLANTA Braves and GWINNETT Braves. No confusion there. They aren’t even the same.
No other Braves’ farm team has reported having the same issue. Even the Rome Braves who are 70 miles Northwest of Atlanta never seem to have an identity problem. In 2017, ever minor league team in the Braves’ organization are known as the “Braves” except for the Florida Fire Frogs in Kissimmee. Mississippi (AA), Rome (A) and Danville (Rookie) all have kept the parent’s team name as their own. No confusion there it seems.
I’m going out on a limb here and thinking the Gwinnett folks are wanting marketing monies for their team. They want a unique identity for the team which means they want a stupid nickname that no other team has. We’ve been down this road before as minor league baseball teams have come up with some of the most ridiculous nicknames for their teams such as Baby Cakes (New Orleans), Chihuahuas (El Paso), Jumbo Shrimp (Jacksonville) and Biscuits (Montgomery) to name the ones that come to mind.
So what are the choices for Gwinnett?
- Gwinnett Buttons – honors a dude named Button Gwinnett who signed the Declaration of Independence. (See below on what happens to Button later)
- Gwinnett Big Mouths – named after the largemouth bass in nearby Lake Lanier. (Not to be confused with my ex-mother-in-law)
- Gwinnett Gobblers – something to do with outdoors and hunting. (Turkeys?)
- Gwinnett Hush Puppies – not to be confused with the Georgia Bulldogs
- Gwinnett Lambchops – some twisted fusion of home cooking and the tomahawk chop.
- Gwinnett Sweet Teas – well, it’s the south so what would you expect? It would give a new meaning to a two-bagger.
Names that didn’t make the cut were: Duelers (because Button Gwinnett was killed in a duel), Dirt Daubers, Hash Browns, Peaches, Traffic, Grits, Goobers, Commuters, Fire Ants, Corn Cobbs, 85ers and Hustlers.
Those names missed the cut? Wow.
I would have suggested Lexus (lots of those cars in the county), Tax Revenuers (taxes are high there), Baby Braves (would solve the confusion issue) or Ninjas (to honor Japanese steakhouses in the county).
Decision will be made in October or early November.
My prediction: I don’t really care.